Kerri's Dad

My dad died on October 14th. It was rather unexpected. They were putting dye into his heart to look at the blockages so they could make an appropriate plan for how best to proceed. When they injected the dye, he said "That hurts" and passed out. His heart discontinued beating on its own at that point. A team of 25 doctors and others that worked at the hospital - worked on him for 2 hours. I was on a plane before I knew he had died. I thought perhaps I was going home to help out as he recovered from what would become open heart surgery perhaps. Perhaps I knew? I packed some black clothing. I was home for a week. We had a wake / calling hours on Tuesday ~ nearly 1000 people came through the line. The burial was Wednesday. Then the really long trip home Friday. Totally exhausted, running on combination of shock and emotion, trying to go through the motions of everyday life. I didn't talk to him every day. But just knowing I can't ask his advice, or talk about the kids... its rough. Ugly rough. My mind knows that he is not in pain, that quick is better, ... but my heart is that of a little girl that misses her Daddy ~ and no thoughts can convince it otherwise. My Birthday is in November. I always got a phone call from him on my Birthday. He was up at "the farm" in Maine hunting. Not sure if I will be able to handle even hearing the phone ring on my birthday this year.

all clear

All scans and tests are giving us good news! No issues! Dave is 18 months away from the golden goal of "cured"

ALASKA!!!!

Yes! We are moving to ALASKA!!! It was our 17th choice (out of 18) and we had 5 Boston jobs on the request list. Ya get what ya get and you eventually learn to breathe again. We are now looking forward to it! Juneau is one of the cities closest to Seattle. It is the capital of Alaska. The town has 30,000 people and a very low crime rate. They get 277 days of rain per year. It is a sub-arctic temperate rain forest. When it does snow it melts off fairly quickly. So, technically that makes it WARMER than Wisconsin! lol! In the winter they have a few hours of daylight ~ not that 24 hr darkness folks speak of. And in the summer the sun does ~ eventually ~ set. They have a Walmart, Costco (like a Sam's Club), and a Home Depot. And yes, there is always online shopping. I am going to try to figure out how to deduct all "shipping and handling" costs from our taxes!!! I have a list of "family" building ~ folks we know and love that are there, or folks that are really good family friends of those we know and love. So it will be ~ hopefully ~ like being embraced by family when we arrive! We will have to have a housewarming party! Speaking of houses, there are not enough! The Coast Guard is aware of the shortage of suitable housing. They are willing to pay for temporary housing until we land something. So as soon as we have our arrival date hammered out we will be booking that. Like an "Extended Stay" hotel. I expect we will be living in that (with just what we take in the trunk of our car) for up to 2 months. I heard of one family that ~ as a way of getting out of temporary housing ~ wrote letters to people that had their house on the market and begged them to consider renting to a sweet Coastie family. I think, and Dave is not yet "sold" on this idea that our "emergency escape plan" is to buy a house with a VA loan (zero down) and... since the housing market is so challenging, we would be able to rent it out easy-peezie ~ just pay a management company to deal with it. Liam might miss a day or two of school ~ his last day is June 13th I think (not sure how they are making up two cancelled days). At this point we are thinking of having the the movers finish up with getting us out of here (the house itself) June 3rd. His last week of school will be a commute from a hotel. Then Dave would work here through June 10th. Then we head out ~ either that afternoon or the next morning. Our first choice is to drive to Bellingham Washington and take the ferry (thats how we can get the car to Juneau) from Bellingham to Juneau. It is... ha ha!... get this! .... a 2.5 day ferry ride!!!! I hear they have a naturalist on board and they make announcements when a whale or something like that has been spotted. The second choice is to take the Ferry out of Prince Rupert BC Canada. I have to work on getting the kids their passports. We may not be able to take the Bellingham ferry because it may be already booked solid. The only way in and out of Juneau is by Ferry or Boat. Its "land locked." Juneau is part of the mainland but there are no roads up over the mountain out of Juneau. Or tunnels. (can climb over it, can't go through it, can't go around it) Once we get to Juneau we are going to boogie to Kodiak (airplane ride) for the change of command. Then return to Juneau for beginning our life there! I have heard from a number of folks up there, and they all ADORE it there. Dave will be in Boston this upcoming weekend for a colonoscopy and scans. He seems fine and I don't think we can expect any problems. That being said, we have had, more than once, some spot being found that upon further inspection is deemed to be nothing. So, we call that "spot scares" and I feel that I brace for them each time. About mid-way through his treatment year we were told that, although they were 96 % sure they could get rid of it all, if it comes back they have a 4% chance of figuring out how to kill it the second time. So ... yeah... the "spot scares" are frightening. Not sure anyone checks the blog anymore. But if you do check back after March 16th for ~ what we expect to be ~ an excellent report. Okay, thats all I have for now, gotta run! Kerri

In march is a big round of re- checks.Preparing to move to juneau AK.If you know anyone moving to milwaukee our land lord would like to fi

All is still well. Sometime in the next 6 to 8 weeks we should know where the CG is moving us to next summer. Dave has scans again in febr

home sweet home!

I got Dave home at about 4:45 today. Then went round and collected Liam from where he had been "on a play date." Its good to have everyone home together!

General doc was just in. He gets to have ice chips. Slow progression to food. If all goes well - heading home sunday afternoon. Dave looks

a "complete thought" version

Finally got a chance to sit down and write a real post in full sentences. Most of the other's today came from my cell phone.

Last night Dave started to feel "yucky". Although it seemed like a bowel obstruction from the burping and such, there was very little nausea grossness like there was 18 months ago. But this time he was in HORRID pain. There have been times in the past year that things just worked themselves out in a few hours and all we can do is sit and wait. So I got dishes done, paid bills, and prepared for a possible need to be busy away from home over the next few days.

At about 10 pm I went to get my 18 year old baby sitter so I would have coverage if we needed to leave in the middle of the night. I got home, walked in with her, and Dave came around the corner saying "Lets go." I knew he was in bad shape to be subjecting himself to that misery of 18 months ago again. { the treatment is less fun than the condition }

The ER was busy but the wait was not too bad. [funny side note, as the night went on, just about every patient that came in was in hand cuffs and escorted by police... kind of creepy! The staff was ever so nice to us because we were "normal people"]

They got him in, did lab work to rule out any other causes, and gave him a good stiff IV of Morphine and ran a CT scan. Then we waiting a loooonnnngggg time for the scan to be read. It indicated an obstruction build up was underway. [back story for anyone new to this blog - major surgery, causes scar tissue, scar tissue adheres to stuff - including intestines, and that can cause the "pipes" to back up = bowel obstruction] The doctor decided that since he was not having to deal with the vomiting, they would hold off on running the NG tube (we call it the "nasty-gross" tube.) unless that situation changed. But they did want to keep him for observation.

Today, I was with him from 9 until 2 with both kids in the room.

He was tired and resting. But he was not as bad off as last time. He ended up playing video games on a cell phone, and watching TV with his glasses on, and asking me to bring his book in tomorrow. Clearly, I have seen much worse than his current state! He is not in pain, or taking pain meds. But he is not hungry and I think that is one indication that his body still has some work to do on this subject! He is on IV fluids so that nothing needs to go through his digestive system yet. The general treatment plan on these things is "lets just give that system a break, help you loose weight, and give it time."

By 2:00, Aylin had dropped every toy I had with me, and there was no way I was giving them back after they hit a hospital room floor. If nothing else, all this time in hospitals is turning me into a germ phobe! We had lunch in the cafeteria. It struck me as odd how much Liam was so at ease with the idea of the adventure of trying to find the cafeteria and selecting food from it. I guess he has been eating in hospital cafeterias (off and on) for half his life. Its totally normal to him! At 2 we had all reached the end of our ropes, and we (Aylin, Liam, and myself) headed home. It was right after this that a colo-rectal surgeon doctor stopped in. (darn! missed him!) and said that they would be keeping him until Sunday or Monday.

We had a dear friend and her two mature children come by today and take care of / distract /play with the kids while I grabbed some much needed sleep. (got only about 3 hours of it last night). Tomorrow Liam is heading up the road to play with a boy he goes to school with. And then back to the friends on Sunday. ( I might attempt church...) So Liam is excited to suddenly have people to talk to other than me and is comfortable being shuffled to fun play dates. Aylin will stick with me and get to learn all about the wonders of the cafeteria....

darn Bowels

I am home. Will be finally getting some sleep soon. Lots of help so I am okay. I pawned off my work shifts for the weekend. Dave is pulling through this one okay. He is no longer in pain, or on pain meds. I would not be surprised to see him start a clear diet tonight and come home Saturday with "soft foods" diet for a bit.

Note to self: raw carrot sticks, chunks of fresh pineapple, and steak all in one day - not good! Too un-digestable for the big guy!

This is a fast moving storm. He has his glasses on, playing games on phone, watching TV. Not on pain meds. Not in pain.

Dave is in the hospital w a bowel obstruction. He had stomach pain. Very little vomiting so no NG TUBE so far. Good pain meds and keeping an eye on him for 24 to 48 hours

What a memorable Christmas!

Liam cracked me up !

Christmas morning he woke up at 2 am,

(We continue a tradition Dave had as a kid of Santa puts the stocking at the end of the bed - he woke up at 2 and found it there.)

5 am we opened stockings in bed,

and finally we gave in and went down to open presents at 5:45 am.

Aylin was not ready for so much excitement so early either.

I dashed ahead to turn the tree lights on while Dave held Aylin and Liam was waiting along side in the back hall. I have my butt in the air, and I am trying to reach the damn switch on the floor, as I lean over the back of the couch and I am hearing yelling from the back hall.

Keep in mind - its 5:45 am. I am barely awake enough to make sense of any of it.

I come back for them. Aylin has thrown up - projectile style - gotten milk all over Dave, some on Liam,

....

Liam is now in the bathroom Dry Heaving/Gagging from the thought of being vomited on!

All through the opening of gifts I kept laughing. Dave asked a few times what I was grinning so much about or what was so funny. It just totally cracked me up that we were basically done opening presents before the sun was even up! I had signed up to work a partial shift that day - I could have been to work by 8 without having missed anything!

It was just fun to be that caught up by his excitement. And to think, By the time Liam is ready to sleep in, his sister will be ready for a pre-dawn party.

Speaking of his excitement, he has asked to see mount rushmore. We are about 12 hours away. I figure this summer is the time to go. We will be moving in the summer of 2011 so this is the summer to see stuff out this way while we can. How cool is that - a k-5 kid knows enough about the world to ask us to take him to see that!

Loving life!

-Kerri

If they could just stay little for a bit longer...

Aylin is 7 weeks old and some of her 3-6mo outfits are getting too small! She now makes eye contact and smiles. She has a funny sense of humor! She is generally happy - except for SOME diaper changes, and she hates it when bath time is over! But generally an easy going baby. Here are some photos to enjoy.

getting a round to the blog

All is well. On the cancer front his next scans are in Boston in January. But that's peanuts compared to what else is up! On 9-29-09 Aylin Grace was born at 8lbs 4oz 21 inches! Life with such a long awaited child is awesome!

Stolen car returned

We got the car back. We got a call to meet the officer where the car was parked. They had found where the guys were staying. The "bad guys" ran out of the back of the house, but... one of them said to the other, "don't forget to grab the keys" (the keys to our car) they said as they ran out the door in their underwear. They know who the guy is and know some of the places he hangs out. So... they value our keys more than they value pants. a bit disconcerting! Needless to say, the locks on Dave's car will be getting changed out. (a key to his car is on my key chain) The Subaru was used as a "get away" vehicle to break into someone else's home. They stripped the guy's house clean and loaded it all into our car. Our car is missing the kayak rack, tie down straps, car seat, speakers, radio, .... and they slashed the dash board, put graffiti on the steering wheel, .... They got frustrated with the sun roof. Its been broken for years. It will open, sort of, then not close. It looks like they ripped it apart trying to close it. In the mean time, the "cow horn necklace" that Liam just got, the necklace he made for me, and the special rosary I keep in the car have all been recovered. (they actually hung the rosary from the rear view mirror!) The car smells bad so in addition to all of the repairs, it would need to be detailed before any of us drive it! We hope to have a claims adjuster here soon.

The subaru has been stolen but the nursery only needs one thing - just a baby. 4wks to go till the due date.

Utter shock! The only Dunkin Donuts in town does not have decaf ice coffee! Only hot decaf or reg iced! Oh am i glad i got a big one when

Yay! We are home!

Left MA on sunday. Really enjoyed seeing all the rocks and hills as we left MA. Didnt realize how much we missed the north east geology. (

all clear

The results of the scans are great. What a relief. Next scans in January.

Back to Bean town

We are back in New England for a few days. Dave has another set of scans in Boston on Friday the 10th. I am fully prepared, I think, for another "spot scare" where they find some mysterious spot to scare us with and it turns out to be nothing. We have been through that a few times already. We get the results on Tuesday at 4pm or so. We can get more scans that night if needed. In the mean time, we have a special wedding to attend (two people I introduced are getting married), some time with Grammy and Pop pop, some time with Grammy and Grandpa, then off to home. It takes us awhile to drive from here to Milwaukee. Although it is technically only 17 hours of driving, we tend to stop a lot.

"A near miss"

In February, about a week before Dave went to the hospital, he had an evening where he did not feel well (vomiting and general ucky). At the time we just assumed it was a short lived bug. He felt fine the very next day! Once he was hospitalized (a week later) we realized that maybe what he had the week prior was actually some early symptoms we just didn't know enough to realize. Last week Dave had another "ucky" evening. We called some local Doctors that we had gotten to know back in February. He ended up seeing his general physician who took some X-rays. The x-ray seemed to show some build up with a potential for a larger event brewing. 2 days on a liquid diet, some things to help the build-up move along, and all (crossing fingers) seems well again. Maybe if we can catch these warnings, we can prevent another trip to the hospital. In the mean time, my pregnancy is doing well. At 22 weeks. The ultra-sound showed a healthy baby ______ (if you really want to know the gender you will just have to contact me at this point). The belly is very in front and ball-like! I have only put on 5 lbs. When I was pregnant with Liam I could not wear my rings at 12 weeks. The pregnancy ended with some ugly pre-clampsia . I am still able to spin my rings so I think I can hope to avoid the pre-clampsia this time around! I had to work on Saturday and Sunday this weekend. The weather was wonderful which made it an easy couple of shifts. I had asked for either Mothers Day weekend or Memorial Day weekend off. We hope to have some fun family time together on Monday / Memorial Day. Kayaking maybe? -K

not much to say...

I have heard there is someone, that has complained a few times that I have not updated the blog. Okay, JM, here ya go! Dave eats, works, and has all functions up and running. He is back to his usual routine with no changes in life style. Liam is smart, busy with Swimming, indoor preseason baseball, Irish Dance, and occasionally attends Fencing on Saturdays. It looks like, per his request, he will be taking violin lessons this summer. When school starts he will have to chose only 3 activities to carry over into the school year. They stock the local park's ponds with full grown edible fish in March and only kids are allowed to fish for a month. He will probably get dragged to the edge of the pond a few times later this month due to his mom's excitement over it all... not because he wants to exactly! Kerri is pregnant, 11 weeks, less tired, less nausea, but kind of cranky and withdrawn. Although I have a provider for my pre-natal care - the place is a factory and about as personal as a brick wall. So I am still looking for the OB that I would want for to attend the birth (and maybe I will get lucky and find one that Tricare health insurance actually will cover!). I have secured a Doula that is prior military. Liam knows about the baby, is still convinced it is going to be a "sister", and is very excited. I have an ultrasound scheduled for May 11th. At this point Tricare is saying they won't cover it. So "the factory" is working on figuring out what to do about that. If they do the ultrasound, at that point, we would know, and tell ya-all the gender. is that better? Sincerely The pregnant cranky pants!

Drum Roll Please.......

The news of the day is: We have one healthy flashing "Lima Bean." At this stage it is not really shaped at all like a baby. More just a Lima Bean with a heart beat. The heart beat flashes on the ultrasound. I am at "7 weeks 5 days" and the size of the "bean" measures correctly for how far along. All is well. The due date is Oct 4th. I have some names of some OBs. I need to see if they take our insurance. Meeting them will be the next step.

Home

He is home. Tired. But ready to be home! He is being told to eat a few small meals every day, and never eat just one big meal per day. They never found the cause so the can only assume it was some scar tissue acting up. We are just so relieved he is home.

Feb 2 - It was the worst of times, it was the best of times.....

This morning was awful. I have never seen Dave so low. We have been through a lot! He was not crying. He was not moaning. He was just slumped over and deathly still and quiet. He said some things that really shook me up. The humor was gone, heck... it felt like the light was fading. We went down together to the X-ray department and stayed there for a few hours. They put contrast down the (NG) tube (so he wouldn't have to drink the nasty stuff) and then using an X-Ray machine tracked it's progress looking for blockages of any kind in the small intestine. At one point the surgeon caught up with us there, and said that if this scan showed a blockage, the surgery would be tonight! After over 3? hours they brought him to his room for over 2 hours, then brought him back for the final check with X-Ray to make sure the contrast made it to the large intestine (the Large intestine they have looked at backwards and forwards these last few days, so if they made it there, he was in the clear - no surgery!!). The radiologist told us that it made it through with no sign of any problems anywhere. We got back to the room. The Coast Guard Chaplin came in at that point and did an amazing job of telling funny anecdotal stories and breathed some life and fresh air into the room. Dave had trouble talking from the tube, and I had been tapped beyond my abilities to give any more. I was worried that it would take hours to get the tube out ("Sorry, can't do it until the doctor signs this and he just launched in the space shuttle, gotta go, another patient needs me." type fear) The nurse came in quickly and removed effectively that Nasty Gross (NG) Tube that went up his nose down into his stomach. The sun was setting casting a glow on the buildings as we could see from his room on the 11th floor for miles. (Wisconsin is very flat!) But it felt like, to us, that the sun was rising!!! What an awesome relief!!! Within moments Dave seemed to spring to life!!!! I really want to just spend the night calling everyone and sharing the good news. But... in my gut, ....I know it is time to sleep a long deep sleep. (8:30 pm to 6:30 am ought to do the trick!) There may still be a few days in the hospital ahead - I think they have to have his system up and running right before they can release him. Chicken stock and jello will probably be his diet for a bit! If you are local, visit his room. Patient Tower - 11th floor - 131. As of 8 am, call my cell if you want... no fear of bothering me! (if you are one of the few with the phone number to his room, go ahead and call it tomorrow) I will pick Liam up from school and take him in to see Daddy around 2:45.. We are so excited! Thank you all so much for all of your support. It has been amazing!!!! The folks here were right on top of pitching in to help. And many folks were wonderful over the phone just letting me vent! Thank you! Thank you!! Thank you!!!

baby steps

All - Okay... so the new phone is cool and fancy and all... But I can't figure out how to send an email from it! So if I can't post to the blog with the phone, what good is it?!?! I will try to figure that mystery out over the next few days. In the mean time you get stuck hearing me blog when I am home and wiped out tired. So this will be short and ... whatever... (probably not sweet). The nasty "NG" tube is still up his nose down into his throat. It is not longer attached to suction (minor relief) but to a "gravity bag"... To sum up, it is one step closer to getting the thing out! Monday morning they will be performing a "small bowel follow through" exam. They will get some contrast down into his stomach (via nasty tube so he does not have to swallow it) and then they watch how it progresses through the system. There will be lots of trips to radiology to monitor the contrast's progress and such. This should finally put some of the mystery to rest on where exactly the hold up was/(is?). I have a new phone but the same cell phone number I've had for almost 6 years. There does however seem to be a new email address to this phone. Dishes, Laundry, Pay bills, and then off to bed. Thanks for reading. -Kerri

The nasty tube is still up the nose and down into the stomach. But its not attached to suction but is now on a gravity bag. It is a step c

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They ran some cultures on some samples. All day yest. they had this whole yellow gown rule if anyone came into the room. Which they imposed after we had napped in his bed together. So i really thought it was silly for me to wear. Any-who... He tested negative for the nasty one they were most worried about (C-Dif) so they got rid of yellow gown rule! Its so sad that that little bit feels like progress! Last night i mentioned he was having a mini colonoscopy this morning. The doctor called to say everything looked fine. That is sort of good news. It would be easier if he were to say "this heres yer problem...." which he would never say anyways.... Little Asian guys just dont say things like that. The coast guard chaplain came by last night. Dave thought it was funny that he came looking like a chaplain instead of a coastie because its easier for him to get around the hospital in that look. Dave is snoring (drugs from procedure still zonking him out) i am going to see about a new phone.

"Intestinal Track 101"

To be very frank, we know a lot more big words to describe what could possibly be happening in his intestines, and what are the possible ways of treating it, but they still don't seem to know the location or cause of the problem - in him - this week!!! They don't have a game plan. Part of this is because with bowel blockage type problems, some of it is a wait and see game. So even if today were a day in the middle of the week, instead of a weekend, we would probably be in the same place. However, it is a weekend, and all of the faces we met on Friday have someone covering for them over the weekend, we have had a lot of faces that try to grasp the case history (can you imagine telling that story 5 times in 2 days.?...) as well as each of them try to communicate their suspicions, thoughts, theories, (blah, blah blah....)..... Dave is medically improving, emotionally slipping. This kind of blind sided him and when Doctors do this "intestines 101" type stuff it gets frustrating and depressing. He just wants to come home. His stomach no longer hurts. But the tube (NG) is still attached and is causing a lot of irritation in the sinuses. We did get him walking a bit today (no, I was NOT going to tell him - that I told the nurse - to get him to do it). They have added a new team member - a gastroenterologist - because he has some white blood cells in one of his lab workups that may indicate "Pouch-itis" - an infection in the reconstructed J-pouch. All of this may or may not be caused by an obstruction at all; it might instead be a "closed loop bowel obstruction" (take the garden hose and twist it until no water gets through) (which is apparently not the same thing as an "obstruction" which means "something blocking it"[shove something into the hose until it stops the flow]). It could also be some inflamation, maybe from an infection..????. but they are not sure. They don't know where the source of the problem is, what exactly is the source, ... nor do they know if they are going to just "let it work itself out" or if they are going to operate. Oh, and the gastro guy is going to do a "flexiblesignoidoscopy" (a mini colon-oscopy - smaller proceedure but with a longer name) on Sunday at 9 am. At least they are knocking him out for it!!! In the mean time, my phone has been acting like crud. It is causing problems being so un=reliable. I am going to try to pop out and get a new one at some point. Thanks for reading, I will sign off now before I really get rambling - like a weekend doctor......